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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27610280">ash and dust</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweater_sasquatch/pseuds/sweater_sasquatch'>sweater_sasquatch</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Dystopia, Angst, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Protective Ronan, Slow Burn, adam parrish doing his best, angsty space teens fighting for survival, bad choices, hard choices, irresponsible adults, ridiculously slow burn oh my god, some violence, the 100 au</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 02:19:32</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>16,911</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27610280</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweater_sasquatch/pseuds/sweater_sasquatch</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>When Earth succumbed to nuclear devastation, what was left of humanity escaped to the sky - but their time in space is up. To pave the way for the rest of their people, one hundred juvenile delinquents are sent to see if the ground is survivable. </p><p>For Adam Parrish, survival is not a new concept. He knows their best chance is to reunite with their people and he'll make all the hard choices to make sure it happens. Ronan, to even his own surprise, is not a criminal. But his actions to make it on to the ship, risking his life to protect his brother, will assure his death if he is found by their council. He wants to see the Ark never makes it to the ground. </p><p>(A The 100 AU which, along with the Raven Cycle, I own nothing of. No knowledge of the show needed.)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Richard Gansey III/Blue Sargent, Ronan Lynch/Adam Parrish</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>39</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. the open door</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>'Kat - make sure you finish this fic before you post it so you don't leave more unfinished.' Okay but what if I wanted to see if anyone would even be interested first? </p><p>I'm sorry if there will be long waits but I'm really excited about this. A few disclaimers, as said, I own nothing from the 100 or the Raven Cycle. I've just put characters I love into a scenario I love. That being said, this follows up to season 2 of the show and that's it because after that ... eh. Large parts for setting the scene in the first few chapters are heavily lifted and then it has more of my spin on it. </p><p>It's not quite as dark as the show but it's not lighthearted either. Just good old fashion slow, s l o w, burn romance and moral dilemma. It's a plot heavy fic too so there's that and it's gonna be long. Like maybe too long. Anyway I can't promise regular updates but the next chapter is mostly done. I hope you enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>There were very few places on the Ark with a window and the council’s meeting room happened to be one of them - not that there was much to see. Declan gazed out at it now, the vast emptiness, a few dotted stars. He knew Earth was below but it was obscured from his view. It seemed so far away.</p><p> </p><p>‘With all due respect, Chancellor – this is madness.’</p><p> </p><p>It was as bold as Declan had ever dared to be in front of the council. As the youngest member, he spent a great deal of time people pleasing and holding his tongue, but now the words left his mouth without his permission.</p><p> </p><p>‘By all means, Lynch. We’d love to hear any other suggestions.’ Barrington Whelk was sitting to his left, at the long table of council members. Declan had always thought him to be a slimy man, beneath his dark features and large eyes, always clambering, always calculating.</p><p> </p><p>A voice in his head told him that some people would describe Declan much the same. It sounded too much like his brother. At least Declan was suitably horrified at this suggestion.</p><p> </p><p>‘How much time would it buy?’ He ignored Whelk and addressed Chancellor Evelyn Gansey.</p><p> </p><p>‘Currently, we have just over a month.’ She was seated at the head of the table, hands folded in front of her. There was no evidence on her to suggest this decision had been keeping her awake at night – no bags under her eyes, not a wisp of blonde hair out of place. But Declan could see the hard press of her lips. ‘If – when – we proceed, that will buy us one more. It could make all the difference in finding a solution.’</p><p> </p><p>‘It could be a solution in itself,’ Helen Gansey interjected. The Chancellor’s daughter, head of the medical bay, was seated to Declan’s right. Her voice was severe. ‘If it works, we’re sending them to prepare for the rest of us. The ground – it’s the best option.’</p><p> </p><p>Declan’s fingers were digging into his legs under the table. ‘And how likely is that? How do we know they’ll even make it to the ground? It doesn’t sound like we’re sending them to prepare, it sounds like we’re sending them to die.’</p><p> </p><p>‘And they will die here, regardless. We all will. Your personal attachments here are hindering your ability to see what’s best for the Ark.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Hold your tongue, Whelk,’ Chancellor Gansey stood, silencing the whispers that had begun among the other council members. ‘You will do well to remember that Councilman Lynch isn’t the only one with a loved one in lock-up.’</p><p> </p><p>As she passed, she squeezed Declan’s shoulder, short and in the greatest display of something resembling affection he had ever witnessed from her.</p><p> </p><p>‘The Ark was created one hundred years ago. Being stranded up here is all we’ve ever known. We live up here knowing we’re what’s left of the human race – and I’ll do anything to preserve that. Even if it means taking this risk.’ The Chancellor turned to face her council. ‘We start procedures, immediately.’</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>Adam’s cell was four grey walls, a toilet and basin in the corner, and the bunk he was laying on now. For thirty six days he had tossed and turned on the slim mattress and stared at the ceiling, scratching a tally of the days that passed with a pin he had removed from his watch.</p><p> </p><p>Solitary confinement, he had learned, was a bitch.</p><p> </p><p>He only saw guards delivering his meals, under strict instruction not to interact, to ignore everything he might say about an impending doomsday. Other than that, he was left almost entirely on his own – almost.</p><p> </p><p>Adam shifted from lying on his back to face the wall and knocked gently. Four dots. A space. One dot. A space. A dash, a dot, dash, dash. <em>HEY</em>.</p><p> </p><p>There was a beat.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>U OK? </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Adam considered what he wanted to reply and how long it would take to tap out. All he really wanted to know was that his friend was still there beside him.</p><p> </p><p>On the Ark, life was precious. The rules had been in place before Adam had been born and really they were remarkably simple. If you commit a crime, you got the death penalty. No matter the scale, theft or murder, you would be floated out into space. Unless, of course, you were under the age of eighteen – any child found to have committed a crime was sent to lock-up, their sentence to be reassessed when they turned of age.</p><p> </p><p>With what they had done, with what they knew, Adam had very little hope for his life. He was a nobody, not someone to be missed. They wouldn’t hesitate to float him. Richard Campbell Gansey III however, son of the Chancellor, a public figure in his own right, would probably be free in exchange for his silence.</p><p> </p><p>It didn’t matter in the slightest though, if what they knew still stood sound, the Ark wouldn’t make it to Adam’s eighteenth birthday anyway. No, Adam had very little hope at all.</p><p> </p><p><em>OK.</em> He tapped back. <em>U?</em></p><p> </p><p>He and Gansey had been taught Morse code in a Earth Skills class, an unnecessary lesson that most participants slept through. It had been something to keep them entertained for an hour, but the code stuck with them. It was harder here, without pen and paper, but Adam had scratched the alphabet into his wall to remember. Gansey took a moment to reply, as he did every night.</p><p> </p><p><em>ALIVE</em>.</p><p> </p><p>For now, Adam thought.</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>It was harder to sleep in lock up. Adam had spent his free days on the Ark with a bone deep exhaustion, flitting between studies, working in the canteen and volunteering in the medical bay, scraping by with a few hours to rest each night. Now he had the time but spent restless days staring at walls, listening to the guards gossip outside his cell, doing the occasional push up now he was able to eat regularly.</p><p> </p><p>That night Adam drifted into a fitful sleep and dreamed of his old quarters, his father sat with his hands in fists at their table. He awoke to the sound of voices, raised and commanding, muffled by the walls between him and the rest of the detention centre’s inhabitants. </p><p> </p><p>He was already stumbling to his feet when the slat to his cell opened. The guard’s eyes were narrowed and dark. ‘Prisoner six-two-one. Face the wall.’</p><p> </p><p>Bile was rising in Adam’s throat as he did as the guard ordered. ‘What’s going on?’</p><p> </p><p>A clunk of metal sounded behind him, his door opening out of his view. The sound of a guard’s heavy boots entering the room – no, not one. Two guards.</p><p> </p><p>‘Quiet,’ a different one barked out. ‘Hold out your arm.’</p><p> </p><p>The dread that had been pooling in his stomach turned to a heavy, sinking thing. His mouth wasn’t cooperating. ‘Sir, there’s been a mistake – I’m not eighteen yet.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Arm,’ the guard ignored him.</p><p> </p><p>‘You can check my files,’ Adam blurted out, turning away from the wall with his arms held up. ‘It’s not my time – not yet.’</p><p> </p><p>He saw the two guards in front of him now. One was slightly behind the other, taller with more uncertainty etched into his features. The other was sturdier, had a mean expression with a taunt mouth.</p><p> </p><p>With one hand the mean one grabbed at his baton on his belt, flicked it so it extended – Adam had seen those in use before, an electric current ran through them and could take him to the floor. His other hand went to grab for Adam.</p><p> </p><p>Adam rushed the tall man.</p><p> </p><p>A split second decision sent him and the guard crashing into the far wall, but Adam didn’t let himself fall when he stumbled. He pushed off of the chest of the guard and used the momentum to launch himself out of the cell. Behind him he could hear the scuffle of the guard trying to get to his feet, so he whirled and pulled the cell door shut with both hands. The sounds of the guards banging on the door faded as Adam looked around.</p><p> </p><p>The detention centre of the Ark, the ‘sky box’ as his peers had always called it, was made up of three floors, rows of solitary cells like his were on the highest level, built around a small courtyard. In each row he could see there were guards marching more teenage prisoners out of their cells.</p><p> </p><p>His heart plummeted. It was already happening.</p><p> </p><p>‘Adam!’</p><p> </p><p>The familiar voice shook him from his panicked daze.</p><p> </p><p>His eyes darted down the corridor and there among guards that were surging towards Adam now, stood Gansey.</p><p> </p><p>A few inches shorter than Adam, brown hair effortlessly messed, square shoulder set strong. He looked regal still, somehow, despite his month in solitary. His hands were free, a guard’s hand on his shoulder was his only restraint. A pillar surrounded by chaos. Alive.</p><p> </p><p>‘Gansey.’ His name slipped past Adam’s lips like a breath. He threw himself forwards, towards his friend and straight into path of two more guards. This time, he shouted. ‘Gansey! It’s over, isn’t it? They’re reducing population, they’re trying to make more time for the rest of them!’</p><p> </p><p>He could hear his own voice, wrecked and frantic.</p><p> </p><p>‘No – no, Parrish. Listen,’ Gansey was a few feet away, his eyes wide under his glasses. There was a lilt to his chin, one that Adam couldn’t imagine even Gansey would face his death with. ‘They’re not killing us. We’re being sent to the ground.’</p><p> </p><p> ‘But – what? It’s not safe, we get reviewed at eighteen, that’s how this works.’</p><p> </p><p>Gansey smiled, an uncertain thing. ‘Earth, Adam. We’re going to Earth.’</p><p> </p><p>Before Adam could respond, there was the sharp pain of something being stuck into his neck. A haze hit him in a rolling wave and then blackness enveloped him.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>‘<em>… One hundred years since humanity fled Earth. You will all have studied the war that lead to nuclear devastation. And you will all know that we deemed it another one hundred years until the ground would be safe for us to inhabit again…’ </em></p><p> </p><p>Adam came to with the sound of machinery and a cacophony of voices. He could feel the buzz of an engine beneath his feet and the pull of two straps across his chest keeping him in place. There was something clamped on his wrist. When he managed to prise his heavy eyes open, he found himself staring at rows of seated teens in surrounded by metal walls.</p><p> </p><p>‘Adam – you’re awake,’ Gansey was seated beside him, in either a stroke of luck or something he had managed to arrange. He was looking at Adam, turning just his head, the rest of him restrained by the straps of his seat.</p><p> </p><p>A quick glance down showed a device attached to his arm, around his pulse point on his wrist. When he lifted it for closer inspection, he felt a twinge – it had punctured his skin, he realised.</p><p> </p><p>‘It measures our vitals, so the Ark can keep an eye on us.’ Adam glanced up and Gansey was staring at his own wristband.</p><p> </p><p>He blinked at his friend once, twice, beginning to feel less disorientated. That was when it hit him – this was a ship. They really were headed to Earth. No wonder there was such a buzz from the people surrounding him.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>‘… But for the betterment of humanity, we have decided to take that risk now. We are sending down one hundred of you, juvenile delinquents. For you, this is your second chance, a chance for you to be pardoned of your crimes. We have no way to predict what is waiting for you down there, if the odds of survival were better, we would have sent others. Frankly, we’re sending you because your crimes have made you expendable…’ </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Chancellor Gansey’s cold voice was ringing out, her face projected on some hologram in the middle of the drop ship, alongside maps and diagrams of terrain.</p><p> </p><p>‘Your mom’s a bitch, Gansey!’ A kid sat opposite them spat. Adam could feel Gansey wince, but couldn’t find it in himself to disagree. Watching her talk with an air of nonchalance, as if this were the nightly news, made Adam’s stomach turn.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>‘… the location of the drop site has been chosen with the utmost care. Mount Monmouth is an underground facility, stocked to house three hundred people for two years. Fortunately for you, no one ever made it there…’ </em>
</p><p> </p><p>A jolt rocked through the ship and Adam’s hands tensed on his straps. ‘What was that?’ He asked.</p><p> </p><p>‘The atmosphere,’ Gansey answered, his voice laced with an almost giddy disbelief, raised to be heard above the ruckus. Adam could feel his palms beginning to clam up, his stomach churn. ‘Hey!’</p><p> </p><p>It didn’t take long to see who Gansey was shouting at, as a body floated in their direction. The boy in question had left his chair across from them empty and was taking advantage of the lack of gravity as they hurtled from space. He was slight, with bright blonde hair that poked out from beneath a knitted grey hat and a grin half the size of his face.</p><p> </p><p>‘Hey!’ He waved, suspended in the air, lolling back as if he was lying down. The boy squinted at both Adam and Gansey, and then this mouth shifted into a little ‘o’ shape. ‘I know you! You’re Richard Gansey, you’ve been in solitary for the last month! We had bets on what you were in there for. I’m Noah! You might remember me, though I doubt it-’</p><p> </p><p>‘Noah!’ Adam yelled, the noise of the dropship was beginning to grow louder. ‘You have to get back to your chair, it won’t be safe when the parachutes kick in.’</p><p> </p><p>Noah pouted. ‘Fine – but you might wanna tell them that.’ He jerked his head up, towards an upper deck Adam hadn’t noticed yet. Two more boys were floating, kicking at each other in mid-air.</p><p> </p><p>‘You need to return to your seats!’ Gansey shouted upwards, earning him a few scoffs and a couple more insults hurled his way.</p><p> </p><p>‘You sure told them,’ Adam rolled his eyes, watching as Noah fastened his seat straps back into place. ‘Listen! If you want to survive this landing, get back into your-’</p><p> </p><p>His words were lost to screams as they fell from the sky.</p><p> </p><p>Adam had never seen people floated from the Ark, public executions weren’t the Chancellor’s style. But he knew the science, the way people would be sucked out into space – it was all he could think about as they fell to the ground. Or perhaps the feeling when his father would first raise his voice and it felt like the floor disappeared beneath him.</p><p> </p><p>The lights went out and the hologram that had projected the Chancellor and her map and her droning cut off. Adam knew the parachutes had kicked in when it felt like the ship had suddenly been yanked upwards again, the engine stopped and soon the thrusters would follow to ensure they made it to the ground in one piece – he hoped.</p><p> </p><p>But that didn’t stop the ship from rocking wildly now. The screams of his peers didn’t mask the sickening thud of the two boys left floating and unmoored slamming against the wall of the drop ship. Adam couldn’t crane his neck to see if they were okay. He held on and closed his eyes.</p><p> </p><p>He heard the thrusters before he felt them. If he was a more faithful man, he would have been praying. Instead his head had been replaying the same mantra. <em>All for nothing. This is it. It’s all over. </em>Then there was a whoosh, like a match catching but on a scale Adam couldn’t have fathomed before. Then the rocking stopped, though the shouting didn’t.</p><p> </p><p>Then there was nothing.</p><p> </p><p>No movement, no noise. A back-up generator must have started somewhere because there was now low light, though the screen projecting the Chancellor previously didn’t make any attempts to restart.</p><p> </p><p>In the dim light, Adam caught Gansey’s eye. His friend’s chest was heaving, much like his own. Then in the shock and silence, Gansey spoke. ‘Listen – no machine hum.’</p><p> </p><p>Hesitantly, one by one, the teenagers surrounding them began unbuckling, standing from their seats, shouting for their friends and shuffling towards the unopened door. Adam felt his legs shake as he stood to follow – how long had he been out for?</p><p> </p><p>Instead of following the slowly growing swarm of people, heading to where Adam guessed they had entered the ship, he pushed against the flow to where a small crowd had gathered, and then pushed past them too. On the floor, the two boys were crumpled.</p><p> </p><p>He ducked, pressed two fingers to one of their necks and watched as Gansey appeared besides him to do the same to the other. No pulse. A shake of Gansey’s head told him the same thing. Adam swore, under his breath.</p><p> </p><p>‘Oh God,’ a girl behind them muttered, a shaking hand covering her mouth when Adam turned to look at her. Past her, the group by the door caught his eye. Someone’s hand was on a lever.</p><p> </p><p>‘Hey!’ Adam found himself shouting, rising, rushing towards the front of the ship. ‘Stop!’</p><p> </p><p>To his surprise, the teens in front of him parted as he brushed past shoulders and arms, until he could see who had taken it upon themselves to open the ship.</p><p> </p><p>The teenagers were keeping a wide berth around the door, though Adam couldn’t tell if it was because they were frightened of whatever was waiting on the other side, or the sharp boy threatening to open it.</p><p> </p><p>Sharp, was really the only way Adam could think to describe him. He had a cutting jaw line, the curve of his cheekbones anything but soft. His eyes were a piercing blue, trained on Adam and his outburst. He was taller than most of the teens surrounding him and had a buzzed head, yet Adam couldn’t shy away from trying to talk some sense into him.</p><p> </p><p>‘The air could be toxic,’ Adam said. He stepped closer in attempt to keep his voice low, but it meant that he had entered the boy’s space, having to tilt his chin slightly to look up at him.</p><p> </p><p>A jagged smirk spread across the boy’s face. He raised an eyebrow. ‘And? You want to hide in here forever? If the air’s toxic, we’re already dead.’ His voice was cool and Adam suppressed a shudder at the prospect of his words.</p><p> </p><p>Before Adam could reply, thankfully because he was reluctant to admit this guy might have a point, a small voice interrupted.</p><p> </p><p>‘Ronan?’</p><p> </p><p>At first Adam couldn’t see who the voice belonged to, he turned to search the faces and saw Gansey had followed his path to the front of the ship. There was a quiet murmur among the back of the crowd and then a blonde head was elevated above his peers. A younger boy had climbed some of the piping on the wall, hanging off so his wide eyes could sweep across everyone. A face splitting grin erupted when he found who he had been looking for. ‘Ronan!’</p><p> </p><p>Adam watched as the smirk of the guy – Ronan, as it appeared – died. Instead it was replaced with what looked like a well-practiced empty stare. The bob of his Adam’s apple gave him away though, as the kid, having reached him, threw his arms around his neck.</p><p> </p><p>‘Matthew,’ Ronan’s voice was thick, but sounded clearer when he spoke again, despite being muffled against Matthew’s yellow hair. ‘When did you get so tall?’</p><p> </p><p>‘Two years will do that,’ Matthew’s voice was almost giddy, a slight shake to it.</p><p> </p><p>‘Matthew Lynch,’ Gansey muttered into Adam’s ear. The name sounded familiar, but he couldn’t place it. His friend seemed to gather it because he then said, ‘the third Lynch brother.’</p><p> </p><p>The third brother. Of course, Adam didn’t recognise him.</p><p> </p><p>On the Ark, families were permitted to two children, no exceptions. The gossip in the canteen had been rife the day Matthew Lynch had been turned in by his own brothers, following their parents’ deaths. He had been hidden for the whole thirteen years of his life in a compartment beneath the floor in the family’s quarters. Declan Lynch had been promoted to Councilman shortly after, having shown his utmost allegiance to the Ark by revealing his family’s secret.</p><p> </p><p>‘Why are you wearing a guard’s uniform?’ Matthew was squinting, having released his brother. He gave the collar of Ronan’s jacket a tug.</p><p> </p><p>‘I borrowed it, to get on the ship.’ His tone led Adam to believed he hadn’t ‘borrowed’ anything. Ronan reached out and ruffled his brother’s hair. ‘Someone had to keep an eye on you, dipshit.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Open the door!’</p><p> </p><p>The shout came from the crowd and was followed by more alike. Adam could see people, shifting anxiously from one foot to the other, those having found their friends were clasping at each other. People were getting restless.</p><p> </p><p>‘Can’t have a fucking family reunion in peace,’ Ronan muttered. He nudged Matthew. ‘Ready?’</p><p> </p><p>Ronan’s hand went for the lever.</p><p> </p><p>Adam felt a hand wrap around his wrist, could practically feel Gansey buzzing next to him. When he turned, his friend was looking ahead, his eyes bright despite the little light.</p><p> </p><p>‘Excelsior.’ Gansey’s voice was so hushed, he practically just mouthed the sentiment.</p><p> </p><p>In his peripheral, Adam saw Ronan’s hand clench, as it gripped. Somehow, their eyes locked and everything slowed down. He watched as Ronan took a deep breath and brought his arm down.</p><p> </p><p>The door shuddered to life. It was doing something Adam didn’t understand, depressurising or something similar, there was a hissing noise of air escaping, air rushing as the door lowered and then for a moment – only light. Pure, warm, light.</p><p> </p><p>Blinding. Adam shut his eyes, raised a hand to shield his face. It was beginning to subside, the red behind his eyelids lessening as he adjusted, when a rich, wet scent hit his nose. It reminded him of the few times he had been to farm station, but this was different, more intense. It flooded the ship and his senses.</p><p> </p><p>He lowered his hand and let his eyes flutter open. He saw green. He smelled the earth. He heard Gansey gasp beside him.</p><p> </p><p>Where Adam felt cemented to the spot, Matthew was the first to move. A head shorter than those surrounding him, he stepped with a heavy boot towards the door, one leg at a time as if that was the only way he could move. His bright hair glinted, sunlight settling across it. <em>Sunlight</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Matthew jumped, down the ledge of the ramp the lowered door had created, and landed on the ground with a thud. Adam and the teens around him alike, waited with baited breath, for – something. But apart from a beaming grin on Matthew’s face, nothing appeared.</p><p> </p><p>Ronan let out an echoing whoop, apparently no longer able to watch his brother from a distance, and followed him out the ship. His yell broke a dam and teenagers began to stream out of the ship in his wake, Adam caught along with them.</p><p> </p><p>Where others ran, Adam shuffled, eyes wider than he thought were possible. Nothing on the Ark could compare to this. There was warmth to the sun, no fluorescent lights. And trees, so many and so tall, they lined the area the ship had landed in. Some were felled and burned by its impact. Others were covered in a thick, woolly moss. And grass.</p><p> </p><p>He sank to his knees, away from the ship and felt it damp between his fingers. When he dug his fingers into the dirt and felt it cold, he inhaled. The biggest breath he had ever taken.</p><p> </p><p>‘Adam!’ Gansey had appeared, a gleeful smile on his face. He skid to where Adam was kneeling, one hand gripping the collar of Adam’s jacket, the other cupping his neck. He shook him with his excitement. ‘We’re in a forest, Adam. On Earth.’</p><p> </p><p>‘I know,’ Adam replied, sounding bewildered to his own ears. This morning he had woken in a cell.</p><p> </p><p>‘We’re the first people on the earth in one hundred years. We made it!’</p><p> </p><p>Adam swallowed. ‘Ninety-eight of us made it. We need to bury the two that didn’t.’</p><p> </p><p>He felt bad watching the joy fade from Gansey’s face, but it was necessary. Despite dense forest around them, blue sky above them, this wasn’t safety – even if they had escaped the Ark. Adam cast a look around, could see where the trees began to peter off in the distance – then something caught his eye.</p><p> </p><p>Gansey followed as he walked towards what turned out to be a cliff’s edge. ‘Do you see what I see?’ Adam asked.</p><p> </p><p>Beneath them the forest continued, it swooped and fell and there were trees for miles, a blanket of green. Until it reached the rocky side of a mountain, its peaks jutting out like a knife.</p><p> </p><p>‘That – the maps they showed us on the ship,’ Gansey looked pale.</p><p> </p><p>Adam nodded. ‘I think that’s Mount Monmouth.’</p><p> </p><p>‘That’s where all our supplies are.’</p><p> </p><p>He took a deep, steadying breath. It did nothing for the panic rising in Adam’s gut. ‘They dropped us in the middle of nowhere.’</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>‘So what do we have?’ Gansey asked, sat across from Adam in the drop ship. Outside there were hollers and shouts, laughter and what Adam had taken a moment to realise were bird calls.</p><p> </p><p>In here, they had ransacked the ship and the minimal supplies it contained. For now they had draped some tarp they had found over the two who didn’t survive the landing, appreciated by the few dazed, grief stricken teens who were by their sides still. Adam didn’t mention that by the tonight the tarp would have to be used for shelter, their fallen friends in the ground.</p><p> </p><p>Adam looked at the supplies in front of them. ‘One map – that clarifies that, yes, we are in fact on the wrong side of the valley. One Earth skills book, basic survival things. A few canteens. About a week’s worth of packet rations, dried fruit, veg paste. A few basic tools, things for ship repair. Rope. Not much else.’</p><p> </p><p>Gansey grimaced. ‘Not really enough to wait for the Ark, is it?’</p><p> </p><p>‘No,’ Adam sighed. ‘Not at all. We need to send out a party to reach Mount Monmouth.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Well, well, well – what do we have here?’</p><p> </p><p>A teen had wandered in from outside. He stood tall above them, slender and pale, having already ditched his jacket and now meandering round in a white tank top. His hair was dark and spiky. Joseph Kavinsky had a mean smile.</p><p> </p><p>‘Kavinsky,’ Gansey’s expression flattened, a hollow, pleasant tightness to his mouth. ‘Long time, no see.’</p><p> </p><p>‘No surprise there, when your mom decided to lock me up for the past year.’ Kavinsky squatted besides them, picking up the book. He read the title and then tossed it haphazardly back to the ground. ‘Hoarding goods, huh? Ah, feels like the Ark already. How do I get in on this?’</p><p> </p><p>‘There’s no hoarding. This is inventory.’ Adam had never spoken to Kavinsky before, but he knew of him. Knew that no one really knew what he was sent to lock up for – rumours ranged from selling the Ark’s morphine supply to attempting to kill his father.</p><p> </p><p>‘Sure, sure,’ Kavinsky stood. ‘This is more than you had in your quarters, right? Don’t let it go to your head.’ He rapped twice on Adam’s temple with a knuckle.</p><p> </p><p>Adam barely suppressed a flinch, but he managed. Giving him a reaction would have made it too satisfying. Instead he rolled his eyes, refrained from biting and addressed Gansey. ‘We need to let everyone know.’</p><p> </p><p>Only now, standing to leave the ship, did Adam realise Kavinsky’s pack of cronies were paused outside, waiting for their beloved leader to finish tormenting them. He let his shoulder brush past Kavinsky’s with a little more force than necessary as he exited.</p><p> </p><p>The hundred had scattered, not too far Adam hoped, but a few remained by the ship. Noah was lying in a patch of sparse wildflowers to the left, one now tucked into the fold of his grey hat. Some boys were stood in a near circle, trying to analyse their surroundings by the looks of it.</p><p> </p><p>Ronan was leaning against a tree, his guard’s jacket pulled tight against his folded arms. His eyes were hawk like, watching as Matthew stared up at the sky with awe filled eyes. He looked a little less menacing with a smirk tugging at his mouth as he kept an eye on his brother, but as his eyes darted up and met Adam’s grim expression, his own grew dark again.</p><p> </p><p>For a moment Adam couldn’t find the words, thrown by the glare being sent his way. Ronan’s smirk had turned into something of a sneer as Gansey joined Adam. Next to him, Gansey drew a deep breath.</p><p> </p><p>‘If we could have everyone’s attention – just for a moment, please! It’s important,’ Gansey said. His voice carried though the volume wasn’t near loud enough to be a shout or a yell. He commanded their attention, even if the forty or so eyes on them were less than kind.</p><p> </p><p>‘You’re not the Chancellor’s boy here, Dick!’ Someone called out, his mouth shut before Adam could scan the crowd and find them.</p><p> </p><p>‘I’m not trying to be,’  Gansey assured them. ‘We’ve been looking at our terrain and the maps provided to us and,’ he glanced at Adam, hesitant. Adam drew a big breath and watched Gansey mimic him – <em>now or never</em>, he hoped it said. ‘It appears we have been dropped in the wrong place.’</p><p> </p><p>‘What does that even mean?’ This time it was Ronan that called out, pushing off the tree he was leaning against. He walked towards them with a languid gait, an eyebrow raised. A group of kids dispersed to let him through, as though to touch him would be a death wish. Hell, with that glint in his eye, it very well might. But Adam found the thought of perishing in the wild much scarier than Ronan Lynch.</p><p> </p><p>‘It means that everything they prepared to help us is at least a day’s walk away,’ Adam said, stepping forwards as Ronan made his way to the front of the drop ship. Murmurs broke out across the teens listening, more stumbled through the trees aware that something was happening. ‘We have barely any food, not much in the way of shelter and supplies. The communications in the ship are down so we can’t even get in touch to ask for help-’</p><p> </p><p>‘Good!’ Someone yelled, one of Kavinsky’s crew, Adam recognised. He was surprised they were bothering to listen. He was less surprised by the echoing sentiment that rang throughout the crowd.</p><p> </p><p>‘So why don’t you go and get it?’ Ronan had come to a halt, Matthew having followed him. He was almost completely obscured by his brother’s tall frame, but the top of his concerned expression was peeking over his shoulder.</p><p> </p><p>Adam scoffed, letting sarcasm drip into his voice. ‘You want the two of us to go and get supplies for a hundred people? Sure thing, we’ll see you in forty eight hours.’</p><p> </p><p>The look that Ronan levelled him with seemed to be two parts annoyed and one part amused, if the way he tilted his chin was anything to go by. He looked at Adam with a challenge and for the first time Adam knew he would refuse to back down. Gansey’s interjection meant neither had to.</p><p> </p><p>‘What Adam means is that there needs to be a recovery party. And then out of whoever stays, we will need to divide jobs to make this a habitable place to make camp. I think it makes sense to settle around the drop ship, it provides some shelter already-’</p><p> </p><p>‘Who put you in charge, Dick?’ Kavinsky’s voice sounded from behind them. They turned to see him exiting the ship, slinking towards Ronan. He draped an arm around the taller boy, only to scrub a hand over his shaven head after being shrugged off, cackling. ‘And why are you out of contest for the recovery party, hm? Too dangerous for a momma’s boy?’</p><p> </p><p>‘I never said we wouldn’t go,’ Gansey protested. ‘Only that there needs to be distribution of work, for everyone’s best interests.’</p><p> </p><p>Kavinsky stroked his chin with a slender finger, pursing his lips as he pretended to think. ‘It seems to me that a day-long hike is probably a lot harder work than, I don’t know, gathering firewood?’ He turned to his peers. ‘I say we let the privileged do the hard work for a change!’</p><p> </p><p>With that he jabbed Gansey in the chest with a finger, then moved the hand to cup his ear, listening to the roar of agreement from the crowd. Adam could feel an anger bubbling up in him, every cheer urging it on and up his throat. The smug expression on Ronan’s face made it nearly boil over, but he quelled it.</p><p> </p><p>‘Isn’t your brother a councilman, Lynch?’ He asked, feigning innocence with the question in his tone. ‘What kind of privilege is that, then?’</p><p> </p><p>Gansey put a hand on Adam’s shoulder and when he met his eyes, they were pleading. He was clearly trying to keep the peace, but the remark had been worth it to watch Ronan grit his teeth.</p><p> </p><p>‘We’ll go for the recovery party, then,’ Gansey said, simply. He was trying to placate the group at large and not just Kavinsky but Adam still didn’t like the grin the taller boy erupted in. ‘But we can’t go alone – we need more volunteers, around two or three more people to help.’</p><p> </p><p>‘I’ll go!’ Noah had still been sitting down, his legs bent at the knee and his arms resting loosely on top, but he sprang to his feet as he spoke.</p><p> </p><p>‘Me too.’ A girl stepped forwards and Adam immediately recognised her as one half of a set of twins. He didn’t know if the volunteer was Jordan or Hennessey but he knew the pair – they had run an illegal trading ring on the Ark. Whether you wanted a forged ration coupons, some of the moonshine made in secret or even more clothing options, those girls were the go to. Until they were caught, of course.</p><p> </p><p>Her sister laid a hand on her arm as she approached the front of the drop ship. It was uncanny to watch an almost silent conversation, the girls communicating with pointed expressions. Eventually, one subsided, holding up her hand as she stepped away and allowed her sister to join the recovery party.</p><p> </p><p>‘This should work,’ Gansey nodded, pleased, when no one else volunteered.</p><p> </p><p>As the volunteers looked over the map, Ronan lurking closely, Adam packed one of the bags their supplies had been stored in. A few sets of rations, the Earth skills book and an empty canteen. A water source really had to be one of the first things they found. He knew they could go days hungry but would die from thirst far sooner.</p><p> </p><p>‘How do we know you’ll be back?’ Ronan had appeared beside him, leaving Gansey and the others carving out a planned path. He loomed over where Adam was kneeling down, tall and as sturdy as a tree.</p><p> </p><p>‘I didn’t think you’d miss us,’ Adam retorted as he got to his feet, slinging the bag over his shoulder.</p><p> </p><p>‘What’s stopping you from getting to Mount Monmouth and leaving us here?’</p><p> </p><p>Adam snorted. ‘Just because that’s something you’d do, doesn’t mean we would.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Watch it, Parrish.’ Adam took a moment to pause and wonder how and why Ronan Lynch knew his name. And then to admire the way Ronan didn’t falter under his calculating gaze. He sighed.</p><p> </p><p>‘Look, it’s in everyone’s best interest to keep as many people as possible alive. Build somewhere stable for when the Ark makes it down.’</p><p> </p><p>If Adam hadn’t been studying him, he might have missed the Ronan’s eyes widened a fraction, the way his jaw tensed. ‘The Ark’s coming down?’</p><p> </p><p>He almost laughed. ‘What, did you think this was some kind of bizarre punishment? Weren’t you listening on the ship? For the betterment of humanity or whatever – we are humanity. The Ark and the hundred here, we’re all that’s left.’</p><p> </p><p>There was an odd sense of satisfaction in walking away from Ronan looking so unsettled. Adam didn’t turn back as he approached the others and told them had best get moving if they wanted to make the most of daylight.</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>Adam had never walked this far in his life. And they had only been going for forty minutes. In that time they had left the drop site, all the smouldering trees from impact, and had started through the forest. Thankfully, it wasn’t too dense, though the trees were tall they were spread far enough to let in light through their canopy, for Adam to keep an okay eye on their surroundings.</p><p> </p><p>‘Oh! Oh!’ Noah exclaimed in a hush tone. ‘Another one! Look, Gansey. Up there!’</p><p> </p><p>Noah had been spying birds for twenty minutes. Adam had been amazed at the first one, there weren’t any living animals on the Ark after all. The four of them had stood still and watched it preen itself on a branch, unperturbed by their presence, then spread its wings and take flight. The second one had been a sight too. But by the fifth, Adam knew they weren’t covering enough ground.</p><p> </p><p>‘We’ve got to keep going,’ he pushed, not letting his stride falter.</p><p> </p><p>Jordan, not Hennessey as it turned out, kept pace with him, her eyes scanning the treeline ahead. Her face was stern, but there was wonder in her voice when she muttered, ‘this is so unreal.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Isn’t it?’ Gansey and Noah were catching up, happy to keep on despite their distractions. ‘I’ve imagined Earth for so long but I never thought it would-’</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Crack. </em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>The noise came from behind them. The four of them whirled around, eyes searching through the forest. Adam’s mind raced through Earth skills, things it could be. A bear? Mountain lion? They were definitely in North America, so it could be a possibility.</p><p> </p><p>‘Oops,’ a voice said.</p><p> </p><p>Matthew Lynch was a while behind them, a sheepish grin on his face as approached them. He waved as he did so, mop of blonde hair bouncing as he bounded towards them. Adam felt his heart rate begin to settle.</p><p> </p><p>‘Jesus, kid. Scare me half to death, why don’t you?’ Jordan had a hand to her chest.</p><p> </p><p>‘Sorry – I wanted to join you guys, I was just struggling to catch up,’ Matthew came to a halt where they had stopped. He fiddled with the fray of his jacket sleeve. Toed his boot against the forest floor.</p><p> </p><p>Adam narrowed his eyes. ‘Does your brother know you’re here?’</p><p> </p><p>‘Absolutely,’ the boy lied, his eyes wide and innocent.</p><p> </p><p>Resisting the urge to groan, Adam merely sighed and started walking again. It took a moment for the others to follow, still chatting. He made a mental note not to let Matthew out of his sight. It wouldn’t be hard, he eventually careened ahead with Noah, enchanted by everything in the forest.</p><p> </p><p>‘Can we do introductions?’ Matthew asked, eventually, falling into step besides Adam. ‘I know Noah and Jordan – they had rec time privileges with me in the skybox. I'm Matthew. Someone called him Gansey.’</p><p> </p><p>Adam had forgotten that Matthew hadn’t grown up with everyone else on the Ark. He had been locked away by his parents and then again by the council. He wouldn’t know Gansey, even though everyone knew about the Lynch brothers. ‘That’s Richard Gansey the third. He’s the Chancellor’s son. I just call him Gansey.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Kavinsky calls him Dick,’ Matthew didn’t sound particularly bothered when he said, ‘I hate that guy.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Me too,’ Adam agreed. The forest had begun to peter out and the ground was getting rockier; they were starting to descend further into the valley.</p><p> </p><p>‘And you?’ Matthew turned to look at him. ‘What’s your name?’</p><p> </p><p>He couldn’t remember the last time someone asked him that. ‘It’s Adam. Adam Parrish.’</p><p> </p><p>‘I’m glad you’re here, Adam.’ It was almost painful how sincere Matthew sounded.</p><p> </p><p>Before Adam could respond, thankfully as he didn’t know what to say to that, Noah appeared besides them. He held out his hand, a few crumpled mushrooms lay flat on it, they were a deep brown in colour. Not particularly appetising.</p><p> </p><p>‘I think we might need a few more to feed the camp,’ Adam pointed out.</p><p> </p><p>Noah giggled. ‘You’ll have a big problem if you try to feed the camp with these.’ He wiggled with eyebrows at Adam. ‘These have more… medicinal purposes.’ Adam surprised himself, barking an unexpected laugh.</p><p> </p><p>‘… I don’t get it,’ Matthew whispered.</p><p> </p><p>‘How do you know that?’ Gansey lifted one from Noah’s palm, held it to the light to examine it.</p><p> </p><p>‘I’m from farm station. And foraging was my favourite part of Earth skills. Let’s just say I had a particular interest in the capabilities of some plants. And getting too high to replenish the stock I took was how I wound up in the skybox.’ Noah hopped down a ledge, the gentle incline leading them closer to Mount Monmouth.</p><p> </p><p>‘I never knew that,’ Jordan mused. ‘We all know how I got time. But what about you guys?’</p><p> </p><p>Adam could sense Matthew tense at the question. It had likely been aimed at Gansey and Adam, everyone knew what happened when Declan and Ronan turned in their brother, but he wondered how Matthew felt about it.</p><p> </p><p>‘Yeah, I tried to tell you in the drop ship – bad timing on my part probably – we took bets on what you did though. Why would the Chancellor put her own son in lock up? And in solitary?’</p><p> </p><p>‘There was a rumour you two killed a guy,’ Jordan was running her hand along the leaves of a bush as they walked alongside it.</p><p> </p><p>‘Goodness,’ Gansey recoiled. ‘No – no, there was no murder.’ He looked at Adam, tilted his head.</p><p> </p><p>‘I mean you might as well tell them. It’s not like they can stop you here.’</p><p> </p><p>Gansey took a deep breath, slipping into a solemn state Adam could relate to. ‘The Ark is dying.’</p><p> </p><p>There was no response from the three teenagers.</p><p> </p><p>‘Gansey overheard his mom talking about it and told me. We put together a plan to tell everyone, we thought they had a right to know. But someone found out and turned us in. With current population, there’s roughly one month of life support left,’ Adam elaborated. His mouth was dry. He wished there was water in the canteen. ‘Maybe two now that we’re gone.’</p><p> </p><p>‘That’s why – today,’ Jordan sat down on the Earth, braced her arms on her knees. ‘I thought maybe they had new information, that it was suddenly safe or they found something. But it’s not, it’s just-’</p><p> </p><p>‘A last ditch effort,’ Adam supplied.</p><p> </p><p>‘Hope,’ Gansey corrected. ‘Which is why we have to do our best down here. Make sure that everyone up there can make it down.’</p><p> </p><p>Matthew offered a hand to Jordan and helped her to her feet. His face didn’t have the same glee as when he first joined them, but his mouth was set with sturdy determination. He looked a lot more confident than Adam felt. ‘Let’s go find Monmouth then.’</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>Someone had found more tarp somewhere. There had been poor attempts at shelters made, attached to the drop ship to cover the ramp that lead to it. People had been gathering fallen branches and sticks for firewood. Ronan didn’t care.</p><p> </p><p>‘Where’s Matthew?’ He demanded, approaching where Kavinsky was leaning against the ship, watching the others work in the sun. It was afternoon now. Ronan had gone to take a piss and when he returned his brother was nowhere to be found.</p><p> </p><p>‘You’ve lost baby brother already?’ Kavinsky laughed, his shoulders shaking. ‘And to think, you were only just reunited. You should take better care of where you put your things.’</p><p> </p><p>Ronan knew Kavinsky. Before he had wound up in lock-up, he had encouraged some of Ronan's more questionable habits that involved a lot of Ark moonshine and trying to forget that he and Declan were the only free or living Lynchs' left. They had wound up spending more time together than Ronan would have liked but that didn't mean he could stand the guy. </p><p> </p><p>‘You’ve been here the whole time. You must have seen where he went.’ There was no question, Ronan knew Kavinsky must know something. There was a hum under his skin, vibrating through his arms and down to his feet, that he knew wouldn’t settle until he knew Matthew was safe.</p><p> </p><p>‘Maybe. I might have seen the tot following after Dick and his faithful servants. I might not have -’</p><p> </p><p>The words were lost to the noise that escaped Kavinsky when Ronan slammed him up against the side of the drop ship. He wheezed out a laugh and Ronan lay his arm across his neck. ‘He went after Gansey?’</p><p> </p><p>Kavinsky smiled, not disturbed by his limited oxygen. ‘Looking for adventure, the little shit,’ he rasped.</p><p> </p><p>Ronan released him suddenly, Kavinsky wasting his just returned breath on laughing again. It didn’t matter to Ronan though, he was already tearing into the drop ship, where the supplies were being stashed. The few teens in the ship jumped the moment he entered, didn’t say a word while he emptied a bag and began stuffing rations inside.</p><p> </p><p>‘Oh, c’mon Lynch. Let the kid have some fun. I mean – it’s not as if Gansey or Parrish will let him have any real fun anyway.’ Kavinsky squatted down behind Ronan, whispering into his ear.</p><p> </p><p>‘Fuck off, K.’ Ronan shoved him and watched as the amusement died on Kavinsky’s face. When he was laughing he was a devil, someone who wanted to tug at every string he knew you had. Now he looked like he wanted to cut them instead.</p><p> </p><p>‘Can’t believe you’re going to run after Dick. It’s exactly what he wants, y’know. He wants to run this place just like his mother – he’s nothing like us.’ Kavinsky followed Ronan as he left the ship, his words like a taunt.</p><p> </p><p>‘I’m not going after Gansey. Fuck off.’</p><p> </p><p>Ronan had abandoned Matthew once and hadn’t seen him for two years as a result. He was here now, his brother and his responsibility back into his hands. And within an hour he had let it slip away again. Fucking up again wasn’t an option.</p><p> </p><p>‘You’re right, you’re right. Let’s not talk about Gansey.’ Kavinsky didn’t hesitate to keep pace with Ronan as he headed into the forest, he had barely left the site when Kavinsky said, ‘let’s talk about why you’re not wearing a wristband. How’d you get it off? Does it have anything to do with why you’re dressed like a pig?’</p><p> </p><p>Ronan stopped walking. His guard’s jacket felt tight around his chest, like a vice. It made his throat feel dry. ‘Why do you care?’</p><p> </p><p>‘It’s obvious, isn’t it?’ Kavinsky knew he had captured Ronan’s attention, wandered a few feet away to sit on the trunk of a fallen tree. He smirked as he watched him. ‘I know you think very lowly of me, but I’m not entirely stupid. These,’ he lifted his wrist, ‘tell the Ark we’re alive. Take them off, all our problems are solved. We mean nothing to them once we’re dead, they’ll leave us alone. We can make this place our empire.’</p><p> </p><p>‘I’m not looking to rule, Kavinsky. I’m going to find my brother and you’re going to leave me alone.’ Ronan was well aware of the weight on his hip. The gun that completed the guard’s uniform hung heavy in its holster.</p><p> </p><p>‘Don’t be stupid. You don’t know where they went, you’ll be lost in five minutes. Gansey and Parrish are fuckers but they won’t let anything happen to the kid.’ He got up and crossed to Ronan, squaring his shoulders. ‘He spent however long locked underground by his own family and then more locked up in a cell by the ones who sent us down here. He deserves a chance to run around. Kick some leaves or whatever. You should have some fucking fun too.’ He jabbed Ronan with a finger.</p><p> </p><p>Before Ronan had a chance to argue, react to the shame he felt swell at his words, Kavinsky grabbed his hand. Slowly, he wrapped Ronan’s fingers around his intact wristband. ‘Help me get this off and then we can start on the others. We’ll be untouchable to the Ark and that’s when the real fun will begin.’</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>After walking for two hours, they found a river.</p><p> </p><p>In a way, it was almost alarming, how easily they found it. It was exactly where Gansey had predicted – or more so read. He hadn’t let go of the map since they left, making his own mental notes as they wandered through. <em>There’s that clearing, do you see? We were dropped very rurally but I suspect that if we had landed about here, some of these buildings might still be standing. And yes, if we follow this way then – look! The river!</em></p><p> </p><p>It was wide, stretched across the landscape, rushing faster than Adam anticipated. It was a wonder they hadn’t heard it a mile away but then again, they had never heard a river before. As soon as he breathed a sigh of relief (water: found), he began to hope it wasn’t too deep. They had to cross that. He doubted any of them would know how to swim.</p><p> </p><p>‘Woo!’ Noah was determined to test that, apparently. He ran forwards, trying to untie his shoes as he went, tossing them aside and racing towards the water. He tugged the legs of his pants up and stood in the water. It reached the middle of his calf before he started hopping from one foot to the other. ‘Shit, that’s cold!’</p><p> </p><p>When Noah didn’t burst into flames or melt into acid, when the water was deemed safe, Matthew began to follow, not bothering to take off his boots, just wading straight in. He kicked at the water, watching the spray gleam in the afternoon sun. It would set soon, Adam feared. They would need to be across the river with some kind of shelter in mind.</p><p> </p><p>Still, they needed a little break at least, Adam’s feet were beginning to ache from walking. He had been used to hard work on the Ark, but this was different. He crouched, cupped his hands in the river, relishing the cold water against his fingers, and brought it to his lips. He drank and once he started, realising just how thirsty he was, he didn’t stop. After a while he splashed his face, ran his hands through his hair.</p><p> </p><p>‘Good?’ Gansey was now besides him, dipping the canteen in the river. Adam wished they had bought more containers. He nodded and watched Gansey’s slender fingers twist the cap on.</p><p> </p><p>When Adam looked up, Matthew had wandered closer and Noah in the opposite direction. The older boy was much further down the river, squatting down to gaze at something in the bank. He had made it a long way in a short amount of time, his face slightly obscured from the distance, but Adam could see his face light up when he spotted something.</p><p> </p><p>He rose to his full height. ‘Guys!’ Noah yelled. ‘Guys, c’mere! I’ve found-’</p><p> </p><p>What he found, Adam wouldn’t know.</p><p> </p><p>One moment Noah was on his feet and then it seemed he was hurtling through the air, propelled by the weight of whatever had struck him. He let out a strangled scream, shattering the tranquillity of the forest and the water.</p><p> </p><p>Adam didn’t recall moving, he suspected the others didn’t either, but he was now on the ground, bracing himself over Matthew, shielding the pair of them. Gansey and Jordan had hit the deck too.</p><p> </p><p>He winced as he glanced up, saw nothing but Noah lying on his back and the red seeping pool clouding the river. There was a something lodged in his shoulder. A spear.</p><p> </p><p>‘Back to the trees! We need cover!’ Adam roared, pushing himself up and tugging Matthew into a crouch.</p><p> </p><p>‘Noah!’ Matthew lurched towards the boy but Adam gripped his arm, probably bruising him with the force he pulled him back by. There was a noise like a gust of wind and another spear landed by Noah’s feet.</p><p> </p><p>‘Trees!’ Adam put one hand over his head and watched Matthew do the same, as they moved together. His other hand was on Matthew’s back, keeping him low. Gansey and Jordan were following, he could hear their footsteps.</p><p> </p><p>They ran into the trees once more, Adam scanning frantically for a place to hide.</p><p> </p><p>‘Here!’ Jordan yelled, standing behind where a giant tree had fallen, its roots tugging up the earth and creating a ledge she ducked behind. The three boys scrambled to join her, Adam’s back pressing up against the cool earth.</p><p> </p><p>His chest was heaving, it was impossible to get enough air. Whether it was from running or fear he couldn’t tell. After what seemed like an age, he rose, peering over the ledge. From there he could see the river bank through the trees. And Noah, on the ground, being dragged by two figures.</p><p> </p><p>Matthew gasped from behind him. Jordan managed to cover his mouth just in time for the shout of Noah’s name to be muffled. In horror and in silence, they watched until the figures and Noah were gone.</p><p> </p><p>‘We’re not alone,’ Adam muttered.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. in cold blood</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Adam and the others go in search of Noah, joined by a reluctant Ronan. Ronan remembers life on the Ark.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hello! I'm not even sure if anyone is waiting for this update but. I really enjoyed writing it, so here it is. While Pynch is the main pairing in this fic, it really is a Raven Cycle fic. I've enjoyed planning out all the relationships and character arcs so far.</p><p>There's some non-graphic injury discussed and high stakes business but I don't think there are really any other warnings on this chapter. I hope you all enjoy! - Kat</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>‘We have to go after him!’ Matthew was beside himself, eyes bright with threatening tears, the curls of his hair damp on his forehead.</p><p> </p><p>‘We need to get back to the drop ship,’ Adam said. He knew it was true, though it pained him to say it. They were still huddled under the ledge, but as soon as they left cover they would have to run.</p><p> </p><p>‘But we can’t just leave him.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Matthew, listen. Until just now, we didn’t even think there was any possibility people survived down here. But they have and they have spears and probably other weapons and we are dangerously out of our depth right now.’ He wasn’t trying to scare Matthew, but it was true. ‘We will come back for Noah, I promise we will. But we need to warn the others and we need to figure out a plan. We’re not safe here.’</p><p> </p><p>Gansey’s brow was furrowed, his glasses askew, looking, in all truth, very un-Gansey like. He had a streak of mud across his cheek, his hair slightly darker where sweat had soaked it. Adam could see his two sides warring in his expression – his sense of logic and his sense of morality. He wanted to go after Noah, valiantly save him and return them all to safety. He likely knew they would all die doing so.</p><p> </p><p>‘How did they even survive?’ Gansey asked. In the two hundred years they had been in space for, the Earth had clearly repaired itself from the nuclear devastation they had all learned about. How people managed to do the same, Adam didn’t know. ‘They were wearing animal pelts, did you see?’</p><p> </p><p>‘Does it matter, right now?’ Jordan was glancing around like she was sure they were going to be taken off guard again.</p><p> </p><p>‘No,’ Adam agreed. ‘We can worry about that later. We need to get back. Always keep someone in your eyeline, we only stop when there’s cover, understood?’</p><p> </p><p>Around them it was starting to get dark. Dusk was settling on the woods and starting to throw shadows, darken corners. Adam hoped they made it back before night fell entirely.</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>‘Stay still and it’ll be over quickly.’</p><p> </p><p>Kavinsky spoke from high above the girl, his cronies held her each by one arm. Another one, Skov? Or was that Swan? Ronan didn’t know which, but he was using a piece of scrap metal torn from the dropship to pry off the girl’s wristband. She yelped as the pressure was applied and if it wasn’t for the way they dropped her as soon as it was free, Ronan would have intervened. He told himself that each time they grabbed someone new from the crowd.</p><p> </p><p>‘Does it feel better? To be free?’ Kavinsky asked, holding her chin between two fingers. She nodded, but when he let her go, she rushed back to the friends she had watching, clutching her arm. ‘Free from the Ark’s tyranny! Who’s next?’</p><p> </p><p>People weren’t exactly lining up to get their band removed, but Kavinsky had a way of plucking someone from the crowd and turning them into a volunteer. They had managed to make a fire, a good thing too as night had brought a chill to the air, and were throwing each broken band to feed the flames. Ronan stood silently by it.</p><p> </p><p>On the one hand, Kavinsky was inspiring chaos. The different teens among them were already tired, scared, hungry. For some the idea of abandoning the Ark excited them, it meant possibility without the watchful eye of their elders. For others they were reminded that the people they were sent down with were also criminals, that this was a dangerous place to be.</p><p> </p><p>It didn’t matter for Ronan because the other option was simple. If the Ark made it down he would be arrested. He would be separated from Matthew and, he supposed, Declan. Perhaps worse, if the Ark maintained its use of capital punishment on the ground, he would be killed. He couldn’t let that happen – what he had done to make it down was far worse than most of these teenagers’ crimes.</p><p> </p><p>So he stood by as Kavinsky took over and watched the treeline, waiting for Matthew to return.</p><p> </p><p>He heard their approach before he saw anything. There was a rustle from deep in the forest, the pounding of footsteps, of running, growing closer and closer with each passing moment. Heads turned at the noise as Ronan pushed towards it, his hand on the gun in his holster.</p><p> </p><p>It was like a dam breaking, when Jordan broke through the treeline, closely followed by Gansey and then Matthew, Adam right behind his brother.</p><p> </p><p>‘Thank fuck,’ Ronan muttered, heading straight for them.</p><p> </p><p>They were a mess. Each of them were in states of disarray, mud on their clothes and even their faces, there were leaves in Jordan and Matthew’s curls, Gansey was red faced and sweating. Seeing Parrish, usually dangerously collected, tilt his head to the sky and open his lungs was unnerving.</p><p> </p><p>Matthew collapsed at his feet. Ronan moved to hold on to him without thinking, taking his face in his hands and turning it each way. The dirt on his face was streaked through. Tear tracks. ‘You hurt?’ He asked, voice low. His brother shook his head.</p><p> </p><p>‘What the hell happened?’ Ronan growled, turning to Parrish. ‘You should’ve sent him back, he’s a fucking kid.’</p><p> </p><p>The boy still was still facing upwards, hands on the back on his head as his breathing steadied. Ronan watched his throat bob as he sucked in the air, the strong lines that disappeared beneath the collar of his t-shirt. He saw the sharp eyes that turned on him.</p><p> </p><p>‘We’re all kids, Lynch.’ Adam’s voice was low and rough.</p><p> </p><p>‘So, where’s the food?’ Kavinsky had come to stand beside them. When Parrish replied, he didn’t look away from Ronan.</p><p> </p><p>‘We were attacked.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Attacked?’ Someone in the crowd cried. ‘By what?’</p><p> </p><p>‘Not what,’ Gansey said, pausing for more air. ‘Who.’</p><p> </p><p>A chill crawled up Ronan’s spine. It gripped at something in Ronan’s chest that felt a lot like fear. It was the same feeling he felt when the guards arrived at their quarters on the Ark and he knew that would change everything. Ruin everything.</p><p> </p><p>‘Spell it out for us simpletons, why don’t you, Dick?’ Kavinsky was still taunting but there was a tense set to his shoulders. They were square and ready for a fight.</p><p> </p><p>Adam turned to Kavinsky, his eyes cold, jaw tensed. ‘There are people here. Somehow people have managed to survive. They attacked us.’</p><p> </p><p>‘The good news is,’ Gansey stepped forwards to address the crowd at large, his face truly the son of a politician, ‘it means we can survive here too.’</p><p> </p><p>‘The bad news is the grounders will kill us before we get the chance!’ A boy shouted.</p><p> </p><p>A thought crossed Ronan’s mind. ‘Where’s the kid with the hat?’</p><p> </p><p>Besides him, Matthew, now on his feet, let out a whimper. Adam met his eyes and the story was already half written across his face. There was something haunting about the way he paused, as if to remove the pain from his expression, and then continued. ‘They got him. He was hurt and they took him. We don’t know where.’</p><p> </p><p>A murmur echoed round the camp, disbelief etched onto faces. Ronan felt the chill rack up his spine once more, colder.</p><p> </p><p>Kavinsky shifted from one foot to another, then threw up his hands. ‘So the Ark was wrong! Everything they told us, everything they let us believe, a lie! All the more reason to make sure they never make it down here.’</p><p> </p><p>He gestured to the fire. Ronan could spot the moment Adam made the connection. His eyes travelled from the carnage in the flames to the wrists of those surrounding him, then back to Kavinsky. His expression was murderous.</p><p> </p><p>‘You’re taking off your wristbands?’ As if to check, his eyes darted back to Ronan, trailed down his torso and to his arm. Ronan had never had one in the first place but it didn’t stop his defences raising at the scrutiny. ‘How many?’</p><p> </p><p>‘Twenty-four and counting,’ Kavinsky said, gleefully.</p><p> </p><p>‘You’re idiots,’ Adam shook his head. ‘Didn’t you wonder why they sent us down here? Life support on the Ark is failing. Everyone up there will dead within a month or two.’</p><p> </p><p>For a moment, silence fell across all the people gathered. Then someone in the crowd cried out.</p><p> </p><p>‘So we’re just guinea pigs? Test subjects? They send us to make sure they’ll survive here, then lock us all up again when they join us? ’</p><p> </p><p>‘The Chancellor assured us we’ll all be pardoned for our crimes,’ Gansey spoke up.</p><p> </p><p>‘I don’t trust a word that comes out of your mother’s mouth!’ Someone shouted.</p><p> </p><p>‘It doesn’t matter!’ Adam turned to face the people around him. ‘We’ll die without them. It’s not just friends and family up there. It’s our doctors. Our farmers. Our engineers. Now, knowing that we’re not alone down here, if the Ark thinks we’re dead, if they abandon us – we’re beyond fucked.’</p><p> </p><p>‘They’ve already abandoned us,’ Ronan interjected, bitterness rising in his throat. ‘We’ve been fucked since the moment we arrived – maybe we’re better off without the Ark.’</p><p> </p><p>‘That’s more like it!’ Kavinsky roared. There was a wild glint to his eyes, the fire reflecting his manic grin.</p><p> </p><p>The disappointment in Adam’s face was harder to stomach, though Ronan couldn’t work out why. He was almost pleading when he approached Ronan. When he spoke, it was quiet, only just audible over the conversation their peers had broken into. ‘Lynch.’ The corner of his mouth twitched to say his name. ‘I know your brother’s up there. Don’t do this.’</p><p> </p><p>‘If they’re really desperate, they’ll come to the ground whether we made it or not,’ Ronan said, willing himself to believe it.</p><p> </p><p>‘Ronan,’ Matthew scorned. ‘What about Declan?’</p><p> </p><p>In that moment, Ronan could see the years he had missed with his brother. He was far taller now, leaner, the baby fat that once cushioned his cheeks had mostly turned into a smooth jaw. But his eyes were still big and blue, he still had his blonde cherub curls. But Matthew was looking at his brother now as if he didn’t recognise him, hurt etched into the crease of his eyebrows.</p><p> </p><p>‘They’ll work it out. We’ve got to give ourselves a fighting chance.’</p><p> </p><p>‘All you’re giving us is a death sentence, Lynch,’ Adam spat, stalking past Ronan and into the dropship. </p><p> </p><p>To his surprise, Matthew followed him. When Ronan laid a hand on his brother’s shoulder, he shrugged it off, then disappeared into the shelter. Ronan could taste bile in his mouth. He wanted to hit something. Drink something. Wanted to wander off into the woods and see if he could find the grounders that took Noah.</p><p> </p><p>‘Who’s next?’ He barked, stepping back towards the fire.</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Ronan’s family quarters on the Ark was sizeable, comprised of a large lounge, two bedrooms and its own bathroom. Sure, he had to share a bunk with his older brother, but most people had to use the communal showers, had to go to common spaces to relax. His father’s dodgy dealings had a way of setting them up nicely – Niall Lynch could get most things for the Ark’s more privileged residents, in return for amenities for his family. They needed it after all. </em>
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  <em>‘What are they serving today?’ Matthew asked, perched on the edge of Ronan’s bed. </em>
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  <em>‘Probably the same shit as usual,’ Ronan laid a card down and waited for Matthew to play his turn. Ronan could have picked up the last card and called gin, but he had a feeling his brother was waiting for just one more. </em>
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  <em>‘Think you can scrounge up one of those fruit packs for me?’ Matthew stuck out his tongue and rifled through his hand. </em>
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  <em>‘You can have mine. I hate those wrinkly apricots. I bet they look like old man Michael’s ass.’ </em>
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  <em>‘Delightful, Ronan,’ Declan chastised, entering the room. Matthew stifled a giggle. ‘You have to pack your game in. There’s surprise inspection, they’re three rooms down right now.’ </em>
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  <em>It was now that Ronan took in the tense appearance of his brother, the slightly crinkled collar of his shirt, the way his hair stuck up from where he had run his hands through it. </em>
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  <em>Matthew sighed, heavily, flopping back onto Ronan’s bed. He was only twelve years old, yet sometimes he could look truly tired, Ronan thought. ‘C’mon dude, it won’t be long. You know they’re in and out in five minutes.’ </em>
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  <em>Still, Matthew huffed as he rolled off the bed and led the way to their lounge. Their mother was sat on the sofa, her face soft as she watched her sons. Matthew walked straight to her, embraced her quickly, their blonde hair muddling together as she tilted her head to kiss the top of his. When they parted, her fingers trailed down his arms, as if not wanting to let go just yet. </em>
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  <em>Declan and Ronan set about moving the coffee table, one on either end. ‘One, two – three.’ They lifted on Declan’s command and shifted it far enough to the side to reveal the hatch it covered.</em>
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  <em>Their youngest brother knew the routine, he was down there more often than Ronan would like. He lifted it and crawled into the empty space between the floor and the wiring beneath the ship. He lay down, curled on his side and watched as Declan shut him in. They moved the table back and Ronan could see Declan deflate. </em>
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  <em>‘You two look after him so well,’ Aurora murmured. ‘Promise me you always will.’</em>
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  <em>‘We’re his brothers,’ Declan rolled his shoulders, joining her on the couch. He opened a book that was resting on the table, whether he was actually reading it or trying to look natural, Ronan couldn’t tell. ‘That’s our responsibility.’</em>
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  <em>***</em>
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</p><p>That night it rained. Adam had been awake to watch it start, staring out at the entrance to the drop ship and watching it soak the earth. Gansey, who slept very little as it was, had been quick to dash out there, searching for things they could use to trap it. They set out the canteens and strung out tarp to cradle the water. Upon seeing them work, others joined.</p><p> </p><p>Kavinsky may have had many of the hundred eating out of the palm of his hand, falling under the excitement of no rules and no adults, but looking around Adam could tell; most were just as scared as he was.</p><p> </p><p>‘What’s the plan now?’ Gansey asked. He passed Adam half of a protein bar, though Adam was almost reluctant to eat it. He was used to being hungry and it wasn’t as if there was much to go round.</p><p> </p><p>Under Gansey’s watchful eye, he took a bite and struggled through the mouthful. ‘We find Noah. As soon as it’s light, we head out.’</p><p> </p><p>Gansey nodded. ‘Some kids have made knives. Just some little things from jagged ship metal. It’s not much, but it would be nice to go back out there with something.’ The idea of Gansey in a knife fight would be almost funny if the situation wasn’t so dire. ‘The question is, what do we do about here?’</p><p> </p><p>Adam looked around the ship. Some were sleeping, huddled in groups. Many were awake still, looking up at the layers of the drop ship or staring out into the unknown. It was their first night on Earth. It had felt like the longest day of Adam’s life.</p><p> </p><p>‘We find Noah,’ he said again. When Gansey squinted, Adam lowered his voice. ‘Kavinsky is an anarchist, not a leader. I think if we find Noah and bring him back, if we show we’re not scared and willing to face what’s out there to protect people, they’ll be more willing to follow that.’</p><p> </p><p>‘You want them to follow you?’</p><p> </p><p>Adam almost laughed. ‘God no, not me. You.’</p><p> </p><p>‘I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’m not exactly well liked down here,’ Gansey pushed the bridge of his glasses up. ‘They think I’m just like my mother.’</p><p> </p><p>‘But you’re not, and they’ll see that,’ Adam assured him. ‘Then we split up the work. The first thing we need is a perimeter around camp. Then we need hunting and gathering parties. Water and firewood duty. I think Monmouth is too far for us to get to for now.’</p><p> </p><p>‘That’s a lot of work most people won’t want to do,’ Gansey pointed out.</p><p> </p><p>‘Yeah, well,’ Adam was more acquainted with the idea that ‘want’ had nothing to do with work, ‘they’ll have to, if we want to make it down here.’</p><p> </p><p>Gansey didn’t reply for a while and when he did his voice was quiet. ‘And if Noah’s … if we don’t find him?’</p><p> </p><p>Adam wasn’t much one for optimism but he knew his friend was. He passed the protein bar back to Gansey. ‘We’ll cross that bridge when we get there.’</p><p> </p><p>Neither slept much that night. They rested side by side against the wall of the ship, Gansey relaying his thoughts about the ground and its surprise residents. Speculating how they had survived, what their food sources must be like, he analysed the very brief look they had at their weaponry.</p><p> </p><p>Adam responded in grunts or occasional points Gansey might have missed, his eyes darting back to where Ronan slept leaning up against the ships door. A silent sentry. Either to prevent people from leaving or as a first line of defence, Adam couldn’t tell. He watched as Ronan startled awake every so often, sitting up straight until his eyes found Matthew’s sleeping form.</p><p> </p><p>Once he looked up and locked eyes with the teen, Ronan’s piercing eyes already open and resting on Adam. It was strange, the anger he felt at Ronan sabotaging their chances of survival nestled in his chest, humming through his skin. Ronan could probably feel it from the glare Adam was sending his way. But he couldn’t help tracing the harsh lines of his jaw, the curve of his head. He was lulled to sleep by Gansey’s hushed tone, while he tried to unpack the mystery of Ronan Lynch.</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>Daylight arrived gradually, Ronan watched the sunrise from his spot by the entrance. For the first time since they arrived, things were almost peaceful. Last night it had rained and somehow it had made the forest greener, lush and almost soft. Inside the ship, most dozed or talked in whispers. If it hadn’t been for the discovery Parrish and Gansey brought back to the group yesterday, he bet they’d be eager to be out exploring. Now they seemed reluctant to start the day.</p><p> </p><p>At least – most did. The moment light shined through the entry into the ship, Parrish was on his feet. He grabbed the same pack from yesterday and took inventory once more. Then, sitting beside Gansey, they took out the map and began to plan. Ronan watched Parrish’s slender hands drift over the paper.</p><p> </p><p>Eventually the pair appeared to come to some conclusion about their plan and Gansey moved further into the ship – probably to find Jordan or someone else to accompany them. Adam started towards where Ronan was sat and he immediately averted his eyes, looked out to the wilderness.</p><p> </p><p>‘Are you going out?’ Ronan’s head snapped back when he heard Matthew’s voice instead of Parrish’s. ‘You’re looking for Noah?’</p><p> </p><p>‘We are,’ Adam nodded.</p><p> </p><p>Matthew was still seated where he had spent the night, but he began to stumble blearily to his feet, sleep still in his eyes. ‘I’m coming too.’</p><p> </p><p>‘No, you’re not,’ Ronan’s voice was gruff from not speaking for hours. Matthew opened his mouth to protest, but Adam spoke instead.</p><p> </p><p>‘He’s right, you’re not,’ Adam didn’t seem to be phased by the hurt that flashed across Matthew’s face. ‘I need someone in camp to keep an eye on things, someone I can trust. There are kids here who want to help, I need you to talk to them.’</p><p> </p><p>Matthew didn’t speak, somewhat placated with a job to do, but obviously displeased to be missing out on the search party.</p><p> </p><p>‘Actually,’ Adam said, turning to Ronan. ‘I’m here for you.’</p><p> </p><p>Ronan scoffed. ‘I’d rather look on my own, thanks.’</p><p> </p><p>‘I hear you have a gun.’ His eyes trailed over Ronan, down to his hip. Ronan pulled the hem of his shirt to reveal his belt, the slight jut of his hip bone and the gun in its holster. ‘Great. You’re coming with us.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Like fuck I am,’ Ronan said, to be petulant.</p><p> </p><p>‘Fine, give me the gun then.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Again – like fuck is that happening,’ Ronan shifted, getting to his feet. He liked the height advantage he had over Parrish, but it didn’t matter much when he would stare him down like this. ‘Doubt you’d even know how to use it.’</p><p> </p><p>‘You’d be surprised at what I can do, Lynch.’ There was something about the slight curve to Adam’s lips that made Ronan want to put his fist through a wall. ‘Look, you can try to act all cool but I know you want to get Noah back too. And we need every help we can get out there.’</p><p> </p><p>Ronan wondered how Adam could tell he was worried for the kid. He had been planning on going on his own before he was approached. ‘I’ll go,’ he didn’t do much to hide his smirk. ‘If you take off your wristband.’  </p><p> </p><p>‘Not a chance,’ Adam’s hand drifted to where the device wrapped around his delicate wrist. ‘The only way the Ark is going to think I’m dead, is if I’m dead.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Well then, good luck out there.’ Ronan shoved his hands into the pockets of his pants.</p><p> </p><p>‘You won’t be joining us?’ Gansey had appeared, Jordan in tow and, to his surprise, Tad Carruthers. ‘Tad heard we were leaving and wanted to come too. It couldn’t hurt, to have a few more eyes out there.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Parrish,’ Tad gave a smarmy smile. He was an overwhelmingly average kid, Ronan thought, with blonde hair that swept over his forehead and sickeningly chipper attitude.</p><p> </p><p>‘Hi,’ Adam said, bluntly.</p><p> </p><p>‘Looks like a good day for a trek, huh?’ The boy raised his hand to look out at the just breaking sun, completely missing the pained look Adam shot Gansey. It almost made Ronan snort.</p><p> </p><p>‘To find our impaled, kidnapped friend? Sure.’ Adam sighed. ‘We best get moving, there’s a lot of ground to cover.’</p><p> </p><p>He brushed past Ronan, done with his attempts to convince him apparently. He held his pack over one shoulder and walked out into the morning air, Gansey and the others hot on his heels.</p><p> </p><p>‘A few hours walk is a good chance to get to know each other, don’t you think, Parrish?’ For some reason Tad laughed at the look Adam shot him, as if he was joking. ‘We’ll be good friends by the end of it.’</p><p> </p><p>Ronan watched them walk in the direction they left yesterday, until they had nearly vanished into the foliage. He tilted his head back and groaned. Then turned to Matthew, knowing he was being watched. ‘You stay put, you got that? I’ll be back tonight.’</p><p> </p><p>He left the ship, turning and walking backwards for a moment to look at Matthew again. ‘Keep your head low, don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,’ he paused. ‘And don’t do anything I would do. Don’t do anything. Okay?’</p><p> </p><p>With that he jogged after the search party.</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>They hadn’t been walking five minutes when they heard footsteps approaching. Gansey turned to see Ronan had caught up with them, his tall frame dodging branches and leaves. He looked at home here, though, Gansey thought. Wilderness suited him.</p><p> </p><p>Gansey had met Ronan a few times on the Ark, relatives of council members would often be invited to types of gatherings. Whenever Councilman Lynch arrived with his younger brother in tow, he looked as though he had been dragged by his ear. He stood by himself, exuding brooding energy, long enough until no one would notice or care when he disappeared. Gansey, who was born for mingling but detested his mandatory appearances, had attempted to talk to the boy a couple of times.</p><p> </p><p>The poor reception was either because Ronan Lynch didn’t really talk to anyone or because Gansey’s mother had sentenced Ronan’s father to death. And then locked away his younger brother.</p><p> </p><p>‘Jesus, fuck. Would you slow down?’ He announced his arrival.</p><p> </p><p>There was a curious lilt to Adam’s chin when he paused mid stride. ‘Can’t keep up?’</p><p> </p><p>‘Do you want me here or not?’ Ronan asked.</p><p> </p><p>He was still wearing his guard’s uniform, though Gansey didn’t think there was much of an alternative. On the drop ship they had been given warmer outerwear and sturdy shoes that weren’t necessary on the Ark. They had their own pants and shirts and no changes. Apart from the ones that had been stripped from the teens that didn’t make the landing. Those were tucked away safely – share based on need, Gansey was trying to apply the same philosophy they used on the Ark.</p><p> </p><p>Besides, he thought, Ronan’s jacket was probably better protection. Should they run into anything. Anyone.</p><p> </p><p>Ronan didn’t give Adam a chance to respond anyway. ‘We should split up a bit – within eyesight but we’ll cover more ground that way. Wouldn’t want to miss something.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Sounds smart,’ Tad said. ‘Parrish and I will go ahead.’</p><p> </p><p>Adam apparently didn’t get a choice in the matter, Tad already on the move. He shot Gansey a look he was well aware meant <em>I blame you </em>and went after Tad. ‘We need to split up horizontally, so we walk wide, in a line. That way people in front or behind won’t disappear …’</p><p> </p><p>He pulled Tad by his elbow to their right and further west until they were in eyeline but could no longer hear their conversation. Jordan went in the opposite direction, far enough to expand their view but not so far that she couldn’t be reached quickly if there was trouble.</p><p> </p><p>They walked in silence for a moment, traversing the forest floor, attention drawn elsewhere. Gansey watched Ronan glance around, watching their back. But also, up at the tree tops, taller than anything they had ever seen, giants above them.</p><p> </p><p>‘It’s wonderful, isn’t it?’ Gansey said.</p><p> </p><p>Ronan narrowed his eyes at him, then seemingly chose to humour him. ‘It’s weird more like.’</p><p> </p><p>‘How so?’</p><p> </p><p>Ronan’s hand had been on his holster, ready to use his gun if needs be, but pointed upwards with it instead now. ‘They showed us pictures and everything. I guess I knew how big it was supposed to be. They didn’t say shit about small it would make me feel.’</p><p> </p><p>Gansey chuckled. ‘Couldn’t have said it better myself. I feel like every human should get to see this. We’re not meant to be stuck up there.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Bet the people down here beg to differ,’ Ronan cast a glance over his shoulder and then muttered, ‘can think of a few people that could do with being stuck up there.’</p><p> </p><p>Gansey murmured, not wanting to agree on principle, but finding that a more shameful part of himself shared the sentiment. ‘Maybe. I wish my sister was here though.’</p><p> </p><p>He could feel Ronan’s eyes on him for a moment. ‘Not your mother?’</p><p> </p><p>The laugh Gansey let out was the bashful kind, the kind reserved for parties when someone mentioned a subject you didn’t really want to talk about, something that wasn’t really funny at all. ‘My mother and I aren’t exactly on good terms.’</p><p> </p><p>‘I guess putting you in solitary could do that, yeah.’</p><p> </p><p>Gansey shrugged. ‘It was before that, really. When I found out about the Ark and that she didn’t want to let the people know what was happening. It was one of those moments when you realise that your parents are just people too. Not necessarily good ones.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Yeah,’ Ronan cleared his throat. ‘You could say that.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Besides, Helen’s head of medical. Having a doctor down here would be handy – of course, Parrish was training under her, but he’s still just seventeen. Not exactly qualified.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Is that really why he wants the rest down here? He’s not just waiting for someone to join him?’ Ronan kept his eyes straight ahead. Gansey’s wandered to their right, where Tad was talking Adam’s ear off. Adam was alert and scanning, stopping to check for broken bits of bushes or tracks.</p><p> </p><p>‘No, not really. Adam is purely a pragmatist. He knows it’s what will give us the best chance at survival, that’s all it boils down to. He might even might have more reason than most to not want the others to join us.’</p><p> </p><p>‘What the hell does that mean?’ Ronan frowned.</p><p> </p><p>Gansey quietened, fearing he had said too much. ‘That’s not mine to tell, I’m afraid.’</p><p> </p><p>That killed the conversation Ronan had been tolerating but Gansey found it was a lot less tense to continue walking in silence. He found, somehow, he felt safer out there, with Ronan Lynch watching their backs.</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>They didn’t find Noah retracing their steps to the river, but then again Adam hadn’t expected them too. Their arrival at the water source was a lot less joyous than their first time, taking refuge behind the fallen tree they had originally hid behind to survey the area. When it appeared empty Adam, Jordan and Ronan made their way to the banks – the latter with gun drawn. Gansey and Tad were to watch from afar and alert them to anything suspicious.</p><p> </p><p>It was easy to find the spot where Noah had been struck the night before. Blood stained the patch where he had fallen, stained the pebbles and the grass as it seeped out of his body, but was gone when it hit the water, washed away with its pull. Ronan looked pale at the sight.</p><p> </p><p>‘Look,’ Adam pointed. ‘It trails in that direction.’ The blood continued to the tree line a while away from where they had entered and exited, in the direction they had seen the grounders drag their friend.</p><p> </p><p>Ronan turned to the splattered path and began to follow it, striding with gun drawn. Adam and Jordan trailed after him, one behind the other, until they were in the forest once more but only for a moment. Soon the trees petered off into a meadow of sorts.</p><p> </p><p>‘Fucking hell,’ Ronan choked out.</p><p> </p><p>In the middle of the field, there was a large tree, its branches gone, splintered as if it had been cut in half. Adam scanned the meadow slowly, not wanting to miss a single detail but also avoiding the most alarming part of the scene.</p><p> </p><p>Strung between the jagged edges of the tree, shirtless and bloodied, Noah was tied up high. His eyes were shut, his face pale and head lolled back.</p><p> </p><p>Adam heard Jordan gasp beside him, but he was already moving forward. The grass in the meadow was tall, some parts brushing against his thigh. He didn’t realise his haste until the ground gave way beneath him.</p><p> </p><p>Instead of his boot meeting earth, it sank through and before Adam could react he was falling – only to feel his wrist seized.</p><p> </p><p>He dared a glance down to see carved, wooden spikes jutting from the bottom of the hole he had stumbled over. A trap. And above him, Ronan’s sturdy hand being the only thing stopping him falling to his demise. He could see the tense of Ronan’s arm, keeping him suspended.</p><p> </p><p>For a second, he and Ronan locked eyes. Ronan’s, blue and sharp, were wide and Adam knew that at least for a split moment, if not still, Ronan had considered letting him go. Adam couldn’t say he blamed him – it would probably solve a lot of problems for him.</p><p> </p><p>Adam hoped his own gaze looked as imploring as it felt. <em>I know you won’t.</em> He thought. <em>You need me. We need each other. </em></p><p> </p><p>Then Ronan’s other hand clamped down on top his first and he heaved. Adam was shocked at the absurd amount of brute force that pulled him on to solid ground again, sent him and Ronan both backwards. Their heavy breaths were the only thing Adam could hear for a moment, staring at this sky above while his heart slowed down.</p><p> </p><p>‘Was gonna say,’ Ronan paused to take another breath, ‘that looks like a trap.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Yeah well, speak up a little sooner, next time maybe.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Not really the way to be speaking to someone who just saved your life.’ Ronan sat up. ‘C’mon. Let’s get him down.’</p><p> </p><p>Adam’s view of the sky was shaded as Jordan stood above him. She reached out a hand and pulled him to his feet and when he was upright, he noticed the glare she sent Ronan’s way.  She spoke, lowly. ‘He hesitated.’</p><p> </p><p>‘And so would I,’ Adam pointed out. Ronan was carefully making his way towards the tree, checking every step with a branch he had found. ‘But he got me out.’</p><p> </p><p>Jordan hummed, not particularly placated, but followed in Ronan’s steps.</p><p> </p><p>It took a while, too long in Adam’s opinion, to extract Noah from his mantle. Thankfully, Noah was still alive and breathing when they managed to lower him. Conscious – no. But that was probably for the best. Getting him back to camp wasn’t going to be easy on anyone.</p><p> </p><p>‘Wait,’ Adam said, inspecting Noah more closely. The wound on his shoulder, where he had been speared, was covered in something damp and green. He peeled it back. ‘They wrapped it.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Why would they do that?’ Jordan asked.</p><p> </p><p>‘I don’t know. I can’t imagine it’s good.’ Adam set the dressing back in place.</p><p> </p><p>‘Can we worry about it later? We need to go.’ Ronan said, glancing around. He was getting antsier the longer they stayed, and Adam didn’t blame him.</p><p> </p><p>‘We need to work out how to move him first.’ Adam looked at Noah, fragile and prone on the ground. He seemed so lifeless.</p><p> </p><p>Before Adam had any suggestions, Ronan bent down and slid one hand under Noah’s knees, the other behind his neck. Then he lifted. ‘Problem solved. Let’s go.’</p><p> </p><p>Ronan began wading through the meadow once more, following the safe path of crushed grassed from their arrival. Jordan and Adam exchanged a glance before beginning the trek after him.</p><p> </p><p>‘Lynch,’ Adam called out.</p><p> </p><p>‘What?’ Adam couldn’t tell if Ronan’s gritted teeth were from the weight of Noah in his arms or being bothered.</p><p> </p><p>‘Give me your gun.’ It was holstered by Ronan’s hip again, but it wasn’t much use to any of them there. Ronan didn’t reply, continued with his brisk gait. ‘Or let me carry him, we shouldn’t be out here unarmed.’</p><p> </p><p>‘You couldn’t carry him,’ Ronan scoffed. Adam tried not to be offended at the accusation. He might not have has a wieldy muscles as Ronan but he had spent a large amount of time on the Ark lugging medical supplies and boxes of food rations. He tried not to rise to the bait.</p><p> </p><p>‘Okay, then like I said: give me the gun.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Or me.’ Jordan piped up. Adam considered her for a moment and concluded that Jordan very well might be a better shot than him.</p><p> </p><p>‘A compromise, then. Jordan has the gun. We carry Noah in shifts.’</p><p> </p><p>Ronan rolled his eyes but stopped walking finally. He shuffled and hefted Noah a fraction higher and jerked his head, as if to say <em>come and get it then. </em>Adam hesitated and then realised they didn’t have the time for this. He stepped into Ronan’s space and lifted the hem of his shirt to unveil the gun in its holster. His fingers brushed against Ronan’s warm skin as he removed it, then passed it to Jordan.</p><p> </p><p>‘Let’s go.’ He lead the way.</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>The walk back to camp was, thankfully, uneventful. Jordan kept the gun for the walk, even upon reuniting with Gansey and Tad. The pair had surveyed them from afar and hadn’t seen so much as a bird. It made Ronan uneasy but he kept his doubts to himself and focused on the fall of each foot in front of him and the burn in his arms as he carried Noah.</p><p> </p><p>It took far longer than the trek there, despite the feeling of there being even more urgency now. They stopped to rest and swap Noah between their group. They quickly realised that carrying Noah on someone’s back was not an option, not with the wound tearing across his shoulder, which left it mostly up to Adam and Ronan to ferry him in their arms – more often than not Ronan.</p><p> </p><p>Quietly, he was grateful Noah was such a scrawny kid. It was a struggle as it was and if he weighed any more Ronan wasn’t certain they could manage.</p><p> </p><p>The kid stirred a couple of times, not coherent and definitely in pain, but his bare consciousness seemed to please Adam. It was hard to tell of course, the teen was good at keeping his face a clean slate, asides from the occasional crease between his brows or flare of anger behind his eyes. Maybe that’s why Ronan felt that slight itch whenever he saw Adam look the slightest bit amused – perhaps it was satisfaction at getting a read on him.</p><p> </p><p>When they arrived back at camp, they were met with eyes on them. They had been gone hours, but as Ronan had promised Matthew, they had made it back before night had eclipsed the camp. Teens watched as they trailed in, one after the other with Gansey at the forefront. At the sight of Noah in Ronan’s arms, they seemed torn. On the one hand, there was a success, they had saved him. On the other, limp as a rag doll, the boy very well might have been dead.</p><p> </p><p>As Ronan passed Kavinsky, he and his gang sat by the fire, he kept his eyes forwards. But he could feel as his movements were tracked. He hoped for once, Kavinsky would just keep to himself.</p><p> </p><p>‘Ronan!’ Matthew bounded up towards them on their arrival. His shirt was damp and dirty – sweat soaked, he realised. ‘Adam – we got a place ready for him. The top level of the drop ship.’</p><p> </p><p>‘That’s perfect,’ Adam nodded at him. Ronan was just glad he didn’t have to see the look on Matthew’s face if they had returned empty handed – or worse, with a corpse in tow.</p><p> </p><p>‘Is he …’ Matthew’s gaze had fallen on Noah, not daring to finish his question.</p><p> </p><p>‘He’s alive,’ Ronan informed him.</p><p> </p><p>‘We need to give him a proper once over, though. He needs fluids too.’ Ronan could see as Adam ran through some kind of mental checklist in his head, already leading the way to the drop ship.</p><p> </p><p>‘Can do, we’ve organised the water we collected, started on collecting more firewood and things we can use to build a perimeter around camp too. I – uh, I heard you and Gansey talking about that last night.’ Matthew looked sheepish at that admission. ‘You were right, lots of people do want to help.’</p><p> </p><p>‘You’ve done great, Matthew.’ Adam smiled tightly at his brother, touching his shoulder gently before disappearing inside. Ronan watched as Matthew tried not to beam at the praise.</p><p> </p><p>Together, they shifted Noah on to the makeshift bed and Adam set to work, lifting the foreign dressing his wound had been wrapped in. It wasn’t long before Gansey appeared to exam that and suddenly things began to feel rather crowded.</p><p> </p><p>‘C’mon Matthew,’ he said, standing. ‘You need something to eat. And some rest.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Look who’s talking,’ Adam muttered.</p><p> </p><p>‘Actually,’ Matthew began, looking between Noah and Adam and Ronan and back again, ‘I think I’d like to stay if I can help.’</p><p> </p><p>Adam shrugged, too busy with examining his patient. For a moment, Ronan watched Matthew. His little brother, holding the hand of that tortured boy. Matthew had been by that river too. It could have been him. He swallowed and left without a word.</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>‘I won’t let you.’ Ronan jabbed a finger into Declan’s chest, his own beating with something thick and heavy. Anger? Grief? He didn’t care.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>‘It’s already happening.’ Declan’s voice sounded so cool, it made Ronan want send his fist flying. Made him want to cry. </em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>‘I’ll take him, I’ll hide him somewhere else. I won’t let you just – hand him over.’ </em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>‘Oh really? Where will you hide him, Ronan? Tell me?’ Ronan could see the slip in Declan’s façade, his perfectly tiled mosaic expression beginning to chip. ‘Where could you possibly hide him on this ship that he won’t be found.’ </em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>Annoyingly, Ronan had no answer to that. They were having this argument outside their quarters, after Declan had dragged Ronan from his bedroom with Matthew. He told Matthew to stay put, prayed now that he wasn’t listening. </em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>‘Mom and dad are gone. It’s up to us now, to keep him safe. I’ve just turned eighteen – do you know what that means?’ When Ronan didn’t reply, averted his eye, Declan pinched his jaw between two fingers and turned him, stared him down. ‘Do you know what that means?’</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>‘Yes,’ Ronan gritted out. </em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>‘It means that if they find him now, they’ll execute me. I can’t look after either of you if I’m dead – is that what you want?’ Declan tilted his head.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>‘No,’ Ronan admitted. </em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>‘This is the only way it works, I’ve thought about it. Together, we hand Matthew in. We’re loyal to the Ark, Matthew is just one more crime in a long list dad committed, had nothing to do with us. Matthew goes to the skybox for a few years-’</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p><em>‘</em>Five<em> years,’ Ronan reiterated. </em></p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>‘And then he’ll be released. Do you think anyone would ever find him guilty? The only thing he’s guilty of is being born, none of this is his fault. He’ll be released back to us and we will all be fine.’ </em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>Resigned, Ronan sagged against the wall. The sound of footsteps rounding the corner made his heart thud. </em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>‘You didn’t-’ he started to accuse Declan but there were already guards appearing. </em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>‘It had to be now,’ Declan’s cool was back in place and Ronan felt like he was being torn apart at the seams. </em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>He watched as they pushed past the two brothers and into their home. Waited and heard as they found Matthew. Heard his younger brother calling his name. </em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>‘Ronan! Declan!’ He yelled. He had a guard on either side, pinning his arms behind his back as if he was a grown man and not a thirteen year old boy, one who would never hurt a fly. ‘What’s happening?’ </em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>There was no time for goodbyes. No way to explain that it would all be okay. Maybe it wouldn’t. Ronan was sixteen and had lost his father, his mother, his younger brother in the space of a month. It didn’t feel like anything would be okay again. </em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>***</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Hours later, Adam exited the drop ship.</p><p> </p><p>He had sent Matthew away when he had learned all he could about Noah’s condition and now Gansey was watching him. It was late and most of the camp was now asleep. A few teenagers talked in hushed voices and the Lynch brothers were arguing by the fire.</p><p> </p><p>‘I was fine,’ Matthew persisted. His eyes looked glossy, reflecting the blaze of the campfire. ‘I was helpful!’</p><p> </p><p>‘You don’t really believe that, do you?’ Ronan scoffed. ‘You’re a kid, Matthew. You’re just another thing that they need to keep an eye on while they’re out there. I don’t want you going on any more of their expeditions, it’s not safe out there.’</p><p> </p><p>‘You went.’ Matthew countered.</p><p> </p><p>‘I have a gun. And I’m eighteen. It’s not up for fucking discussion, okay?’</p><p> </p><p>‘When did you turn into Declan?’</p><p> </p><p>Adam could’ve sworn he saw Ronan flinch. ‘I just want to keep you safe, would you stop making it so fucking difficult.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Really?’ Matthew narrowed his eyes. ‘Is that why you and Declan put me in lock-up then? To keep me safe?’</p><p> </p><p>Ronan didn’t have anything to say in response but Adam watched his mouth open slightly as he searched for words.</p><p> </p><p>‘Did you think I wouldn’t find out that you two handed me in? Everyone on the ship knew but me. And when they told me at first I didn’t believe them,’ Matthew’s voice was high, tears threatening but he swallowed them back. ‘But now you’re here and you’re trying to – trying to keep me locked away again! I’m not doing it anymore!’</p><p> </p><p>Before Ronan could manage a reply, Matthew stalked away, thankfully to the drop ship. If he had headed in any other direction Adam might have intervened but it looked like the boy wanted to settle down for the night, maybe sleep off his anger. He left his brother simmering with the dying fire.</p><p> </p><p>Ronan dumped himself on the floor, unaware that he was being observed. He sat with his elbows resting on his knees and scrubbed over his head. Then, he watched the embers fading. Adam took a breath and sat down beside him.</p><p> </p><p>‘He just needs some time to calm down,’ he said.</p><p> </p><p>Ronan glared at him. ‘What the fuck makes you think you know anything about this?’</p><p> </p><p>‘Tensions are high. Everyone’s scared and fear makes people act out.’ Adam replied, plainly. He grabbed a nearby stick to poke at the ashes of the fire. There was no rain tonight, perhaps they should keep it burning all night?</p><p> </p><p>‘What about you, Parrish? You scared?’ Ronan’s voice was still laced with venom.</p><p> </p><p>‘Obviously,’ Adam rolled his eyes. ‘Noah’s got a fever. I’ve been trying to calm it down but I can’t manage it. I think his wound is infected. Maybe that’s what the grounders wanted, why they wrapped it like that. That doesn’t matter now, I guess.’</p><p> </p><p>‘So what are you going to do about it?’ The boy next to him was keeping his eyes firmly ahead, watching the blaze die. Adam took a moment to study his face and its harsh lines. He looked tired. It was surprising he was still awake.</p><p> </p><p>‘I don’t know,’ Adam said, honestly. ‘I feel like I’m supposed to, but I don’t. See if he makes it through the night. Maybe take a look at that Earth Skills book and see if there’s something that can help. Hope that the Ark realises we need help sooner rather than later.’</p><p> </p><p>Ronan’s eyes turned to him, followed the line of his arm to his wrist, where his wrist band was still intact. ‘You think they’re going to arrive and save the day. They won’t help us.’</p><p> </p><p>‘You really still think we’re better off without them?’ Adam asked, incredulous. ‘We’re ridiculously out of our depth, you saw that today, surely.’</p><p> </p><p>‘I think that we’re expendable to them. They said that themselves.’</p><p> </p><p>‘You weren’t even in lock-up.’ Adam pointed out. ‘How did you get on the ship?’</p><p> </p><p>‘Does it matter?’ Ronan snapped. ‘I wasn’t going to sit here while they sent my brother to die.’</p><p> </p><p>‘Yeah, well. Maybe they don’t care about us, but our survival ensures theirs. That will be worth something to them.’ Adam had grown tired of this conversation, exhausted from the day’s trek and his fretting over Noah. He could probably close his eyes for a moment if he slept besides him, he would wake if anything was wrong. Plus there was always Gansey.</p><p> </p><p>He rose to his feet, Ronan glancing up at him. Adam had already began to walk away when he stopped. For some reason it was hard to just leave without a word. </p><p> </p><p>‘You should sleep.’ He told him before retreating. His legs felt like lead and who knew what tomorrow would bring.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank you for reading! Any comments/kudos/bookmarks really mean an awful lot so thank you. I hope you guys enjoyed it. No beta so let me know if you spot any mistakes. You can find me on tumblr as sweater-sasquatch to chat if you would like! - Kat</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Well - that was a lot. I hope you enjoyed it! </p><p>Like I said, this will be long but if you're interested, please let me know. A comment or a bookmark or something means a lot because I'm not even sure how people will feel about this. </p><p>Thank you for reading! If you wanna shout at or with me, I'm also sweater-sasquatch on tumblr. Also no beta so feel free to point out any typos I've missed. Thanks again!!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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